Momma Life in the Making
You see I’ve been a momma since 1990. Oh that was a golden year for me. Let me tell you why…In 1990, I turned 18, found out I was pregnant, I married, moved into my first apartment, graduated high school, gave birth to my first child Joshua and started my first job in corporate health care (it was supposed to be a temporary job. Aren’t they all!). All this happened in one year. In retrospect, I really had no idea what I was doing. Actually, it wasn’t a golden year at all (other than giving birth to my sweet baby son Joshua). My 22 year journey began as a working-mommy! Remember, this was supposed to be a temporary job.
I THOUGHT I HAD LIFE ALL FIGURED OUT…
I guess you could say I grew up kind of fast but at that time I thought I knew everything (oh boy, don’t we all at 18 years old!). My friends were off to college but I was changing diapers. Two years later I had Brittany my precious beautiful little girl. And when she was four I found myself divorced with two babies. I had to quickly embrace my new role as being both mom and dad. I gave up many dreams including going to college. I felt I let my grandparents down (who were the most influential people in my life). I knew they had high hopes for me. My heart was filled with disappointment. But there was always this will in me to never give up and to provide a good life for my children.
I knew in my heart that God had a purpose for me. Many bad things happened to me during my childhood. I didn’t blame God but I asked a lot of “why” questions. The very person God put on this earth to protect me had actually failed me…abused me. My father. My heart searched for answers but it came back empty. Thus, my walk with the Lord was stagnant for many years during my young adult life. I always knew He was by my side. He never let go of my hand but it was me who let go. But I never stopped talking to God.
FAST FORWARD TO MY PARENTING JOURNEY…
I desperately wanted to give my babies a better life than mine. The road was going to be tough yet, all I needed was to follow the Light. Oh that single mommy parenting journey for 15 long memorable years. We had many good days and we had bad days. And like we always say, If I knew then what I know now…I would have done things differently. But if I had never went through those deep, deep, valleys, then I would not have been able to experience those deep, deep, conversations with God!
Here are my babies Joshua and Brittany but they are all grown up now.
Joshua is 26 and Brittany is 24 with two children. Yes, I have grandchildren!! They are my little blessings and bundle of joy.